The Queen has some sad news for all you small dick wonders out there; summer time is here and that means for most fun in the water. What does this mean to you? Well you already have a small cock, and going into the cold water is just going to make the poor thing shrink even more. My advice to all of you sad losers is to be very careful not to let any woman see you with your trunks down. If they do you won’t have a chance in hell of even getting to first base with the woman. But then again as we all know if you do manage to get her into bed, once you go to stick that itty bitty dick in her pussy she won’t feel a damn thing. Hell she could have more fun pleasuring herself with a tampon then your pathetic cock. Let’s see; wait a minute I’m trying to think of a solution to your problem, this is a hard one I have to admit…. Alright; the way I see it is if any of you bitches ever want to climax you have two choices; 1) buy a cantaloupe, hollow out a hole, and pump away, 2) Get yourself a Fleshlight , it feels just like a real pussy and probably will be the closest you’ll ever come to a pussy. Now go fourth and fuck some fruit or fuck you’re Fleshlight , but hey at least you’ll be fucking something for a change. HAHA!
Posts Tagged ‘Fleshlight’
Small Dicks and Summer Time Fun
Wednesday, July 1st, 2009The Claw of Death
Friday, February 27th, 2009Have you ever been just a wanking away on that little dick, feeling O so good, almost there, and then your hand cramps, Oh No! This can’t be happening, I’m feeling so good, my fat willy is ready to explode! Please my faithful hand don’t give out on me now. Just a few more wanks to glory. PLEASE!
Oh dear the man says; what should I do? The man exclaims I know, go see my doctor he will know what’s wrong with old faithful. So the man goes to the doctor and what does he say; sir you are suffering from carpal wanker syndrome. What the man says? I believe you are confused isn’t that suppose to be carpal syndrome a condition for people that type too much? No the doctor says; this is another condition that effects those that wank too much. You see, if you wank to much, you tend to run the risk of wearing down the joint in your wrist so there for your wanking hand as time goes by will not be able to wank with such wonderful gusto. You will have to try and give that hand time to heal and use your left hand to wank. But no doctor that will not work! You see, I tried, but try and try as I may my left hand just couldn’t keep the same pace as my faithful right hand has all these years. The man says with dismay; I cannot get the speed and consistency that I need to fulfill my joyous explosion of ecstasy. Well the doctor stands there scratching his head, and then he says I have one other idea to offer you. What the man says to the doctor I will try anything please, please tell me. The doctor looks at the man and says; go buy yourself a fleshlight, it feels like a real pussy, or so I’ve been told. And best of all the doctor says; they come with different size holes. Yes, I’m telling you the truth, you can get one to feel like anal or you can get one to feel like a pussy, the choice is up to you. Now young man go fourth and wank to your hearts desire with your new fleshlight which can be used with either your left or right hand. So there for you can be a lefty and have a good wank! Enjoy.
More Little Dick Pics
Saturday, December 13th, 2008Oh now would you look at this more pictures of Rich’s sad little cock. You know looking at the pics Rich’s sent to me I have to wonder if there is any hope at all for this poor loser. I’m not one to sugar coat anything I have to say so I’m just going to come right on out and just say that I’m not sure we will be able to find anyone willing to waste there time on such a small dick. I mean just what the hell do you think a woman is suppose to do with that thing? Do you think she can mount it and have any fun on the ride? Hell no she can’t, and I will tell you why; it will keep slipping out! Not only will she not get any pleasure out of that small cock but hell she will have to keep stopping to put the damn thing back in. And lets be honest here; not really the right size for any good sucking action either. So I guess what Rich needs is a fleshlight or a doll because a real woman just isn’t going to go for that pecker unless you pay her.
